Mother Subjectivity: (Re-)Writing My Motherhood Journey through Irigarayan Feminist Perspective
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Abstract
This article academically illustrates the journey of my mother and myself by rereading and revisiting our life experiences. The growth of my subjectivity through relationship and experience draws on the auto-ethnographic methodology to conduct research, a principally feminist political methodology, as a groundbreaking means to voice out not only concretely and experientially, but also in a radical way. This leads to a new epistemological challenging in social science. As a daughter, woman and researcher- -a fragmented but connected self- - who grew up and lived with domestic violence, my family is my fieldwork. Certainly, my mom will be a subject of the study. Significantly, myself being a mother, this not only draws on accounts of the physical and emotional intimate engagement but also instinctual detainment. In other words, my self and my soul are completely subjugated in silence. Hence, these journeys of two women’s relationship crystallised for me in a
profound way to be cognisant of subjectivity in terms of bringing me back to be aware of being mindful as well as respectful of our embodied situation. This, in turn, allows a better conceptualisation of subjectivity that will be the preliminary engagement to cultivate the awareness and respectfulness of the others vis-a-vis intersubjectivity. Indeed, subjective emancipation shall create an equal and co-existent society and, in turn, respectful humanity.
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